crash through the rafters

It would be a lie to say I have had no aspirations, at college and school it was socialism and the banner of Marxism emblazoned on all my books and thoughts. People thought I was saying it so they would take notice of me, that wasn't true. Carrying around my copy as my own personal book of truth it drove me to carry on believing that that Marx and Engels were right. From an idea to a revolution, the attraction of throwing Molotov cocktails at the establishment was for me so strong at the peak of my feelings for moral responsibility and love for Rage Against the Machine.

Imprisoned and tortured but as long as you knew you were there to right the wrongs of the world with a banner covered in paint and handcuffing yourself to the steps of parliament, telling everyone to fuck off if they told you what to do. How this gets replaced with emptiness I do not know.

As I move into my adult days, working in an industry where we can create things for the betterment of the human race, science experiments a bit beyond the sky above us, systems to help rescue workers save lives, looking to the stars so we can break the borders of the world. In a way, my little corner of my lab is helping all of these things, the little seed of saving some of the world. But I don't really believe if the seed did help I was doing it to save the world, far from it. Communist Manifesto gives way to Norwegian Wood, Socialism giving away to Capitalism. Peak of morality giving away to the harsh skin of real life, the realisation that there is no longer any black and white.

I can't compete with others in their ambitions, I wouldn't want to. If RATM can sell out, I think I everyone in their lives are allowed to as well.

However, after what was said it would be an even bigger lie to say I have not current aspirations;-
1.ensuring the last verse I ever write is for the woman I fall in love with
2.finding both a green and red copy of Norwegian Wood
3.to keep going

The rest can wait for me in the next life if I ever get there.

Throwing yourself into the arms of a crazed blonde girl talking gibberish with a thick Eastern European accent. Rather a bunch of crazed blonde girls are throwing you into her direction. She talks some more gibberish, so I walk off in the opposite direction. No ones loss in as the cold air starts to send a shiver up my spine. I tap my 5 cigarette of the night, I prefer it to drinking 3 pints and passing out in my own sick. I never hear from the blonde girl again, in fact I haven't seen her to this day.

musik

• Boy Decide- Murder by Death
• Sometimes the Line Walks You- Murder by Death
• Comin' Home- Murder By Death
• Sawdust and Diamonds- Joanna Newsom
• I will Follow You Into the Dark- Death Cab For Cutie
• Closer- Nine Inch Nails
• Fuck Tha Police- NWA
• Standing in the Way of Control- Soulwax Remix
• 1979- Smashing Pumpkins
• Jo Jos Jacket- Stepehen Malkmus
• Cut Your Hair- Pavement

buch

• The Dragon Syndicate- Martin Booth

videopiele

• Super Mario Kart

vershieden

• random nights without feeling the need to go inside Scandals
• chatting to Jose and Enrique
• Steve Mcqueen, what a fucking hero!
• waking up on a plane and asking for a beer
• luncheon with Pedro where we talk the most utter bullshit, at least we find it funny
• Joanna Newsom forgetting the words
• Bekah for the conversation, Samuel for the attentive looks he gives me across a room
• driving on the wrong side of the road in a big car and the fact the guys trusted me to do it